Back to top

Northwestern Alumni Career Webinar Series

Love takes work. We know that to be true, yet with the demands of kids, jobs, volunteer work, and family, it is all too easy to put our romantic relationships on the back burner. In this webinar, Dr. Alexandra H. Solomon will discuss what it takes to nurture emotional and sexual intimacy in a long-term relationship. Dr.

The Magic Touch

Would it surprise you to know that there are health benefits of holding hands with your partner as you walk down the street, or embracing when you return home at the end of the day? Or setting your hand atop his thigh or behind his neck when you're the passenger next to him in the car?

How Was Your Day?

Is there a more banal question than How was your day? When asked, we often treat it as a throw-away and reply with a quick and mindless "fine" or "okay," our eyes never leaving the computer or the television screen. We rarely expect it to be the start of a conversation.

Who hasn't at times hated a loved one?

It happens in every intimate relationship, a moment when frustration or upset or disdain grows so large that the thought crosses the mind: I hate him / I hate her. Love and hate — they aren't opposites, and it's not a zero sum game where the more of one means the less of the other. Both feelings can stir, as they inevitably do.

Women once sent love letters on scented stationery, hoping the fragrance would arouse the object of their affection. Those days are largely gone, but the wish to arouse a loved one still remains. Only the vehicles of communication have changed.

Tip to all heterosexual men in long-term relationships: women’s sexual desire operates differently than your own.

Although research has found that heterosexual men in the early stage of relationships typically overestimate a woman’s sexual interest, this overestimation doesn’t persist once relationships evolve into long-term. Recent studies have found that men in ongoing, romantic relationships seem to underestimate their female partner’s sexual desire.

Sex is like money; only too much is enough — John Updike

It’s a popular notion that couples who engage in more sex are more content in their relationship than couples who engage in less. But is it true? Perhaps sex operates like money. In that area, research has revealed that the greater one’s family income, the higher the level of reported satisfaction — but only to a point.

“You’re going to remember your first sexual experience for the rest of your life,” a wise mother said to her teenage daughter, “so think carefully before you make a decision that can end up haunting you forever.”

When Sexual Compulsivity Interferes with Intimacy

Through our use of cell phones, laptops, and tablets, we can feel as though we are more “connected” than ever before. We can check Facebook posts, send emails, stream video, or text our partners — all while sitting on the bus, in Starbucks or at work.

What trips up couples? Poor communication, overworked spouses, the stress of raising children, financial pressures — these are what typically come to mind. But one culprit often goes unmentioned: a partner's history of childhood sexual abuse. Some studies estimate that 1 in 5 women and 1 in 20 men have been subjected to sexual abuse as youngsters.